Off the wagon…

Have you ever fallen off the wagon?

Have you ever even been on the wagon?

I fell off and fell hard.

Take your pick… If I was on a kick I fell off. Lost the passion, intensity, fervor and even the fun.

Have you ever been into a workout routine or diet and then skipped a few days or had your rhythm thrown off? Miss a few days and all of a sudden it gets hard to get back on track.

It’s not so much a physical thing. At least not for me…

It’s all in my head.

I got off my morning routine and now I am struggling to get back on track. As much as I enjoy that routine I also love having a few extra hours of sleep.

I’ve stopped writing… Slowed down on my reading…

I fell off the wagon.

Time to get back on.

Say Something!

Sometimes I don’t blog because I feel I have nothing to say.

Other times it is because I have too much to say and don’t know how to condense it or break it into multiple posts.

And sometimes I wonder why I am not a better blogger that posts cool videos, helpful links and makes his posts look great with wicked cool graphics.

Then I turn around and post 4 sentences because I feel that I need to post something.

How I used my Moleskine journal to propose to my fiancee

As of Saturday March 13, 2010 I am officially engaged to my sweetheart Heather Foy. I’ve got a million thoughts to share but I will keep it short today and just share the “how” of our engagement. I’ll share my thoughts and feelings on the whole thing a little later as well as share her feelings on the whole ordeal. Plus, I’ve got a great and embarrassing story to share if Heather will give me her permission.

A constant in our relationship has been hand written letters. Not on a schedule, but I try to regularly send her something in the mail. I’m fond of traditional letters because I feel they communicate far more than an e-mail does. Not that you say anything different using either medium, but the fact that you took time to sit down with a pen and paper and actually write. I don’t think I’ve got romance down to a science, but I do think it is sad that hand written letters and notes are more of a novelty than anything else.

My original idea of how to propose involved one of these letters, but I could never quite figure out how to say what I wanted to say or how the proposal would tie in. Plus handing her a letter in person just never worked for me when I would picture the moment. One day while writing a letter, with my journal close by, it occurred to me that the journal would be the best way to do it. I could say as much as I wanted to say, and the fact that it would be written as journal entries would allow me to write about her rather than to her.

But what to do with the ring? I toyed with several ideas, but nothing really clicked.

Tie it to the page marker?

Hide it in the pocket in the back of the journal?

Drop to one knee and pull it out of my pocket as she read the final page?

I had a hundred scenarios in my mind, but nothing satisfied my desire to propose in a unique way.

The idea finally came to me out of nowhere. I would cut a hole into the back pages of the journal and conceal the ring inside. Perfect! I gave myself point for originality and got to work on finishing the journal.

I ended up filling several pages with heartfelt entries about Heather. Ranging from silly observations of her many odd quirks or serious musings about love and the the things that endear her to me. I ended up using the journals strap used to keep it closed for holding the final page over the ring. It kept it secure as she read through the journal. Leafing through the pages and shaking it around. The ring managed to stay put though!

As I said, later on I will share the more emotional and romantic side of this event.

By the way… I used an X-acto knife to cut out the journal. I am certain there is an easier and cleaner way of going about doing this.

*I’m stoked that several people have Re-Tweeted this and are celebrating with us. I was shocked when @moleskine retweeted and then when I found some people had mentioned it in blogs like this one http://www.moleskinerie.com/2010/03/this-guy-used-a-moleskine-to-propose-to-his-girlfriend.html If this is my 15 minutes of internet fame then I couldn’t be happier. Ha!

Spring Cleaning

Something about the first sign of spring that gets me in the mood to clean. Much to my roommates chagrin this motivation hasn’t quite moved me to dig deep into the pile of laundry in my bedroom.

Last night and today have gotten me into a mode of digital spring cleaning, and I must say it has been rather therapeutic.

It started with finally settling on a budget software. I went with Mint (http://www.mint.com/)
If you’re looking for a way to keep an eye on your spending habits it is a great tool, but the lack of a future view tends to keep it from being a truly outstanding budgeting program. But for what it is it is just about the best I have found.

I’m late to the table with this so you may already know about Mint. But I love being able to see all my accounts in one place. Plus it is great to see where my money is going. Right now, Coffee shops and fast food are wrecking my bank accounts.

The budget is a  constant work in progress, but it’s nice to get it started… again.

Phase 2 involved cleaning out all my documents folders. Why did I even save half of these files?

I had one that was just a number. I don’t think it was a phone number. The document was titled “number.” Very helpful. Obviously I assumed I would just know what this number was.
I didn’t.
It’s gone.

I put everything in a place where I can find it.

Multiple, clearly named folders… What a concept!

I think this morning was the most therapeutic act of all.

Purging my inbox.

I deleted a solid 700 e-mails. That’s probably small fish for you to fry, but for me I was overwhelmed by how much had accumulated over time.

I didn’t need to free the space. I’m not that important of a person, but it felt good to click “delete” on all that junk mail. And there was a sigh of relief as I deleted the last of e-mails from an old flame. There was a little temptation to take a stroll down memory lane. I gave in and read a brief back-and-forth.

Then I remembered why we broke up.

What remaining romantic notion there was got deleted along the interactions. (and my girlfriend breathes a sigh of relief as well)

Personally, organization is not my strong suit. So I don’t stress out over a little clutter, but it is good to take time and get rid of the excessive clutter. Whether it is your desk or your inbox. Chaos does not make for a healthy creative environment.You have to find what suits you, and if you share a workspace you have to find compromise.

I do know that an exceptional amount of clutter tends to point to deeper matters.
When everything is a wreck I am typically stressed. Rushing from one project to the next, and refusing to take the time to slow down and make sense of things leaves me with a mess, and once things are a mess and I can’t find anything I am stressed.

It’s a vicious cycle.

It’s nice to take the time and break the cycle on occasion. Each time I do so I get a little better at avoiding the cycle in the first place.

Guarding the time of others

If I wrote the previous post on Guarding Your Time  for any reason in particular it would probably be so that I could have a little foundation off of which to post this. I believe guarding your personal time is of great importance, and as I become more adept in the art I will no doubt fill you in on tips and tricks of the trade.

But as much as I believe in guarding my own time I believe even more in guarding the time of others. I believe this principle is of utmost importance to those of us engaged in ministry.

Once you get into the habit of guarding your time it will open you to the possibility of guarding the time of others.

You can look at this in a number of ways, but to share what I feel is one of the most important aspects of guarding the time of others I want to share my thoughts on guarding your Pastor’s time. If you’re not ministry focused it may still behoove you to peruse this article and apply what concepts you can to other relationships.

If this post is directed to anyone it is directed to Student Pastors.

My fellow Student Pastors understand the stress of not having enough time. You have Bible studies to develop, lessons to teach, ball games to attend, fights to break up, and break ups to help your students through. You may take on a few more roles at your church as well. On top of that you have your own spiritual health to worry about and relationships (Wife. Friends. Roommates) to cultivate.

Still I can guarantee you that your stresses, while real and numerous, are not the same stresses your pastor has on his shoulders. He has trusted you with a small segment of his flock to help alleviate that stress and to help build stronger congregation, but he still has the spiritual health of the entire congregation weighing on him.

You may be coping with a teenagers first break-up, but he is dealing with a marriage of 20 years that is crashing and burning.

Two students may have gotten into a fight after your last Bible study on Proverbs 18:6, but your pastor is dealing with an overzealous heretic staging a coo.

Now your stress may win out when a student decides to reenact an Old Testament sacrifice after your 3 month series on Leviticus, but then again that’s your own fault for providing a mock altar and knives… (I know it looked cool, and you saw Rob Bell do it, but you’re not Rob Bell.)

The bottom line: Your pastors time is precious.

It’s very easy to ignore that fact and think “Well he gets payed to be the pastor. That’s his job to be available 24/7.” And that may very well be the case, but what I propose is that while he may make himself available to the church 24/7/365 he is not available to you in that same capacity.

Now certainly he cares about you as a leader in the church. He wants you to be healthy. To make wise decisions spiritually, financially and relationally. And he certainly wants you to check with him before you decide to take your students to do missions work in Haiti.

But your Lead Pastor does not need to be bothered with the minute details of your life and ministry.

For starters…. He trusts you. When he asked you to fulfill a ministry role he was placing trust and confidence in you. Trusting that you have your spiritual affairs largely in order (we aren’t talking perfection. we’re talking sound doctrine and Biblically founded teaching principles) and that you are responsible enough to handle making decisions on your own.

Your Spiritual life

Your pastor is very interested in your spiritual life. He doesn’t want to only be your boss (He is) but he wants to be your pastor as well. Your pastor prays for you. He desires for you to grow in your relationship with Christ and in your ministry.
Let him be your pastor.
But please do not burden him with every spiritual epiphany you have (Something I have done) and with every time you think you see a spook in the corner of your bedroom (I’ve done this too.)
As a student pastor you are responsible for a segment of his flock. So your spiritual health is of particular interest to him. But again he trusts that you have spiritual disciplines in place. I can not stress how important it is that you have personal spiritual disciplines in place.
Are you accountable? Not only to your pastor, but to a trusted minister outside of your church.
Do you have daily habits of prayer and Bible study? I know it seems obvious, but we all know the danger of doing things for God without ever taking time for Him.

Having your spiritual affairs in order helps to take pressure off of your pastor so that you are not coming to him with every problem you have.

Your ministry life

The business side of things.
Planning a youth series.
Deciding between a carwash or bake sale for fundraiser.
The new and exciting ministry book that revolutionized your life and ministry that you think everyone should read.

The minute details need not be gone over with. Of course different pastors have different leadership styles. Your pastor may want and need frequent updates. Perhaps he is a micro-manager. Or maybe he is completely hands off. Find the balance that works.

For me I communicate with my pastor via e-mail. We are far from a some mega-church with multiple sites and tons of staff. In fact we have no staff. But e-mail is quick and easy. It allows my pastor the opportunity to respond to a question or idea at his convenience. Still don’t overload him with e-mails. Stick with the essentials. Short and sweet.

(As a rule of thumb for e-mails I recommend the http://five.sentenc.es/ philosophy)

Again… Your pastor trusts you. Communicate with him.
Be open.
Don’t do anything too stupid.
If your pastor is anything like mine he often times allows me enough rope to hang myself, but trusts that I won’t.

Other tips for guarding the time of others…

Schedule times to meet. Be on time. Do not overstay.

Have an agenda for what you would like to discuss. Do not stray from it unless you are invited to.

Inform them about what you would like to talk about during the meeting beforehand.

If the question can be answered in a text or e-mail then don’t ask it over lunch. Text it.

A guarantee I can make is that if you will make the effort to guard your pastor’s time you will not regret it. You will release your pastor to be more effective in his ministry and prevent him from being bogged down in the tiniest of details.

And if you practice the art of guarding his time he will take your time more seriously.

This principle can be applied to any relationship. I speak from a ministry perspective, but this could quite easily apply to supervisors and bosses.

There is much more to be said, and I have hardly done the topic justice, but it’s a start.

Is this something you practice in your life?
What does it look like in your context?

What is it that you do?

What is it that you DO?

I am not asking where you work. I am not necessarily asking for an answer like

Bank Teller
Plumber
Server
Car Salesman

But those answers are certainly appropriate.

I work at a bank, but I am not a banker. Nor do I work with very many bankers.

I work with Pianists.
Screen Writers
Marathon Runners

What you DO is not necessarily what you do from 9 to 5. But if you are lucky enough to love what you do and perform your passion at your job then more power to you.

You are not your occupation.
You are the sum of your passions mixed with your sincere efforts.
I’m not talking about fame and fortune and getting paid to do what is at this time your hobby.
In fact, it may always be your hobby. Doing it as your job may rob all the joy from it.

Still…

You’re not just an educator. You are a teacher. *big difference
You’re not just a salesman. You are an influencer.

If my occupation defined me at this present moment I would be quite depressed. I am defined by what I do outside of my 9 to 5.
That’s not an excuse to set my cruise control and just survive my job. I should try to bring the level of excellence I strive for in my passions to my job.

Make art (to borrow a term from Seth Godin - Seth’s Blog) out of whatever it is that you do, but do not forsake your personal art.

Life is to be enjoyed and not just survived. If you do not enjoy what it is that you do then find a way to DO what it is that you love.
Don’t quit your day job. Make time for your passions around reality.
If you’re lucky (or maybe just try hard enough) your reality may change so that your passions become your focus and what you do is something that happens in the meantime.

Guarding your time

Time… (Cue Steve Miller – Fly Like An Eagle… Time keeps on slippin’ slippin’ slippin’…. into the future…)

Time is fleeting.

Time is often wasted because it is far too easily spent.

Time is money.

It is probably a far more valuable commodity in the long run.

Given the choice between an increase in my paycheck and an increase in the number of hours in a day I would be tempted to take the hours over the money. Provided of course I didn’t have to spend those extra hours working.

Time management is not my strong point. If you know me you perhaps chuckled to yourself when you saw the title of this blog. In fact the only the thing I may be worse at than time management is following directions. (Me and maps don’t exactly get along, and I’m a bit too stubborn to pay proper attention to a GPS.)

But what I have learned as of late is the importance of guarding my time.

Guarding time… I think that’s an interesting way to look at it.

Not just managing the 24 hours I have in a day, but guarding them.

It’s easy to create a schedule for your day. To put on paper the number of hours in a day that you need for work, study and play. But living by it is a different issue.

It’s like budgeting your money. If you took an hour you could probably have a rough budget on paper and have a decent idea of how much money you have, how much you need to survive, and where your money is currently going. You probably have a good idea of how much money you waste and how much you spend effectively.
The trick is taking the budget off the paper and putting it into action.

The same principle is in effect when it comes to time.

We (We being Me. I think I am hammering this one out for myself) have to learn not only how to budget our time, but to guard that time.

It’s not just about avoiding procrastination, but it certainly involves it. (I’ve checked Facebook and Twitter about 10 times since I sat down to write this)

It’s about structuring your day in such a way that you make the most effective use of your day.

For me I have learned that the most productive hours of my day are between 5 and 8 a.m. Now that was a pretty depressing realization considering the fact that most of my friends are available to hang out  later at night, and that in order to take advantage of my most productive hours I have to go to bed shortly after dark and wake up before the sun comes up.
It’s not easy, but I have learned that if I want to be at my most effective and my creative efforts to be more productive I need to guard those hours of my day.

I’ve not mastered the art of waking up before the sun, but I am getting there. I still fail a lot of mornings. But guarding those hours is becoming a thing of extreme importance. Once I’m up and place a phone call to my girlfriend, my phone is off until about 8am. I take my morning to exercise, have a focused time of prayer, read, study and do work.
Whether it is personal creative work (blogs, writing, etc) or work for LifePoint Church (various projects my pastor has asked me to work on or prepping lessons for our student ministry.) I am amazed at what I can get done when my phone is off and I am not checking my social networks. An added plus is very few people are on Facebook at 6am should I decide to sign on…

Guarding my time means I turn down opportunities to have fun on some evenings so that I can focus on my priorities during a time at which I can be more focused. While it is true I can pray, study or do creative work at any hour of the day I have learned that later hours are not near as effective. My mind has been dulled by the tasks of a full-time job and my energy is waning by the time I finally get around to it. I’m learning to guard my most effective hours and focus on priorities during that time.

How you guard your time is up to you. It may be about structuring your day in a more effective manner. It may be that you, like me, need to learn how to say “No” on occasion. Whether that is saying “No” to a chance to have fun or to a new responsibility or obligation. Perhaps you need to build practices and habits into your day that help you to guard your time better.

I do believe if we are going to be effective leaders and creative individuals we must learn what it means to guard our time.

Smile

Smile.

Seriously… Give it a shot.

What’s the worst that could happen?

Typically… Smiles don’t get people shot. At least not genuine ones.

Now I’ve opened up the door for a ridiculous comment with a wild story about a time when you, or someone you know, smiled and something terrible happened.
But whatever the story I think we can agree that it was a fluke.

The older I get the more apparent it becomes that I don’t know very much.

But the one thing I do know is that a genuine smile just may change your life. It will be nice for the person you’re smiling at, but long-term it will do you more good than it did for them.

So smile today.

At your spouse.
Your kid.
The grumpy clerk at the grocery store.
Your waitress.

Give it a shot.

Watch it spread.

You’ll be glad you did.

Creative sparks

Yesterday I listened to an interview with Seth Godin in which he challenged the listeners with blogs to post an entry every day. He admitted that this approach wouldn’t necessarily net a lot of great posts, but rather several mediocre posts and even a few bad ones. His point was that constantly creating will help us to be more creative in the long run.

I think that is an interesting idea. So often I sit down to post something and scrap it halfway though because it just isn’t good enough to share. The inspiration isn’t there. Or there isn’t enough time. So I just save a draft that I know I will never return to finish.

But what if I took the time to create something new every day…

A new blog post.
A page in that book I want to write.
A new guitar riff, or a full song.
Develop a new lesson for the student ministry at my church.

I am sure I would churn out a lot of bad music and writing. But maybe that’s what I need. I’m sure everyone has the ability to do something amazing in some field. I am more certain that everyone has the ability to be absolutely terrible at something. Maybe that is what separates the professionals from the wannabe’s?

The pros have churned out the crap time and time again until they mastered their art and now consistently create and share and grow in their art. The rock stars are still writing bad songs and saving the demos, and the writers are typing page upon page of worthless musings, but they find the diamond in the middle of it all and share it with the world.

All the while the wanna-be, like me, sits and stares at a blank screen and wonders where the inspiration is to write that book that will change the way people live. The amateurs have nothing but wishful thinking. We wonder how the greats consistently perform on the level that they do and wonder why we will never be that good. We are too lazy to create and too scared to share. Operating under the assumption that the pros have some magic talisman that we lack. We stumble around looking for a lamp that contains a genie rather than making the magic happen for ourselves.

A thought for young ministers…

I’m not sure who reads this blog, but if you have managed to stumble across it and you are a young minister then maybe I can take a few minutes to leave a thought with you.

Let me share a bit of my story to help you understand why I feel a particular way about what I will write about.

As of this writing I am 24 years old, and the student pastor for a church plant in Ruston, LA. I’ve been here for a little over a year, and in 2009 I saw my first year as a student pastor. Now these past 16 months have not been my first foray into ministry, but definitely my first dealings in ministry this way.

I grew up in an established church in Henderson, TN. A church that probably ran in the 50′s when I was just a tyke. I spent my teen years in that church. We saw explosive revival. Lots of people saved. Lots of numbers. I got to be hands on in ministry from a young age. It was an awesome experience.

About four years ago God began dealing with my heart and placed inside of me a burden to move beyond my home church. Now this was a terrifying development in my walk with Him, but exciting as well.

Bottom line:

Taking the chance to be involved in a church plant is single-handedly one of the most amazing things I have ever done. If you are feeling the call to minister. Not to preach, evangelize, teach… but to simply minister… and you want a unique experience… I strongly encourage you to consider involving yourself in a church plant. That is not to say that it is the best move for everyone.

Some need to experience Bible college. I almost went and at times I wonder why I didn’t. I’d probably have a better handle on how to develop a sermon outline and how to properly study. I’d know a bit more about communicating the Gospel. I’d have a few more connections to help me along to the next place.

Some would benefit from the stability of an established congregation. Whether it is moving a large church in a big city and plugging in or enrolling as in intern. There is much to be learned from the way some of our power house churches do things. Those churches certainly need help in discipling the many people they are reaching.

Still others hear the call to go and begin to look across the globe to foreign missions. There is certainly a great need to take this wonderful Gospel of Jesus Christ to the four corners of the earth, and we need many more to answer the call and go.

But to me, an often overlooked ministry is that of home missions.

What I do know is that there are plenty of small churches. Whether they are new plants or just small works that would greatly benefit from the help of young and energetic ministers.

Why should all of our talent stay in just a few places?

I want to challenge you. This is a challenge I can present because it is one that I have answered. I don’t do this with arrogance. I do it with great joy and with the intention of seeing that joy in other young ministers. God has opened my spirit to so many experiences in this past year that never would have taken place in the comfort and ease of my home church.

I certainly would have loved to have stayed. To plug into the youth in my home town, and be a part of the awesome revival that God has in store. It would have been a great joy, and I do not doubt that I could have been used.

But there is something about seeing God work in the moments where you have nothing.

To go from a large church with padded pews, a full band and a great sound system to a house with metal folding chairs, a single mic and an acoustic guitar… Culture shock.

My system needed that shock though.  With that shock comes excitement as I have seen our church move from the living room of our pastor’s house to a building which is our own, and remembering the 18 in attendance my first service, and now we average around 50.

In the past 16 months I have learned a new way to minister. I view the church in a new and refreshing light. My burden has grown. As well has my desire to know God and a deeper and more intimate way.

Part of me feels God asked me to come here for the sake of a church that was starting and needed a few more bodies and another guitar player, but at other moments I am humbled and feel as though He called me here so that this small congregation could minister to me.

There is far more to be said on this subject, and I have every intention of sharing as well as I can.

If you are considering making a move to help a church plant or home missions church I urge you to pray over the decision and seek counsel. If I have any wisdom, which is doubtful, I would love to share it with anyone who is standing at the crossroads where I stood not so long ago.